The Grass is Always Greener

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It’s a universal truth, that, no matter what our position in life, someone will always have more (and of course, some will also have less, although isn’t it easier to get fixated on the “more” category?). Even if we’re happy and successful and loved, we can still look at stories and images of other people and suddenly feel like a massive underachiever. My achilles heel in this category is Beyoncé – platinum records! clothing lines! perfumes! marrying Jay-Z! a bouncing Baby Blue Ivy! an entertainment empire! Look what the woman has achieved, and all at the age of 32. More recently, I’ve also got a particular green-eyed envy issue with The Londoner, a blogger across the pond.

Take a spin through this fantastical lifestyle blog and you’ll get a picture of a stunning young woman, blessed with fantastic genes, legs like a gazelle, and chestnut locks you would swear has come straight from Kate Middleton’s head. All this AND she makes her own Kinder Bueno ice cream. Is this for real???

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There was one particular afternoon I spent scrolling through page after page of the site, and sending a stream of emails to a friend with subject lines like, “life isn’t fair,” “there is no way she actually ate that cheeseburger,” and “i need a 12-step program to stop looking at this blog.” My incredibly patient pal fired back with the requested 12 steps. I’ve pasted the email in its entirety below because it made me laugh, and hopefully it’ll make you laugh too.

step 1: you’re prettier, so you don’t need to look at the blog

step 2: you make even better food, so you don’t need to look at the blog

step 3: you have traveled to WAY better places, so you don’t need to look at the blog

step 4: her clothes are probably borrowed, you own yours…so you don’t need to look at the blog

step 5: her hair is probably extensions, yours is real…so you don’t need to look at the blog

step 6: she’ll probably get fat from eating all that food…genes only go so far, so you don’t need to look at the blog

step 7: she never gets homesick because she doesn’t have a home, she just lives out of a suitcase…you have a home…so you don’t need to look at the blog

step 8: you don’t even know her name…she’s a figment of your imagination

step 9: delete your cookies so the web address doesn’t automatically appear when you type it in 

step 10: click on the “x” close button in the browser window 

step 11: go to curiouscitizen.com and read, now that’s an awesome blog

step 12: go to stelladot.com and just buy something nice for yourself. retail therapy fixes everything (ha!…hellooooo sales person)

I know that these steps aren’t true (in particular 1-6 seem pretty suspicious, and no doubt The Londoner is a super sweet girl, who, in all likelihood, really does have a pretty enviable wardrobe, has travelled to some amazing places, and was lucky to win the genetic lottery when it comes to incredible hair), but it was still sweet of my friend to help me think otherwise, even for a split second.

The moral of the story? Sometimes it’s fun to spend time checking out where you think the grass is greener. But sometimes it just takes a friend to show you that the lawn is pretty awesome right where you are (even if they have to fib a little to do it ;).

p.s. Step 12 is not a sales pitch (it’s word for word what came in that email, true story!), but a little retail therapy is always good advice, so if you need a little pick-me-up, check it out.

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